How To Be A Rude Barista.

How to be a Rude Barista.

1. Line forms behind us. Barista doesn't make eye contact. Barista talks to her friend.

2. While we (finally) order, a baby in a small family starts whining. Flustered barista says to me, "Sorry, I don't have kids yet, I'm like, what is that HORRIBLE noise?!" And yes, I'm holding Oliver, horrible thing that he is.

3. We sit around and stand there and notice that people previously behind us in line are getting their drinks made before us. Granted, we have an order of 4 drinks so I could understand dispensing someone a quick drip coffee, but no, we're talking full on espresso drinks.

4. She pauses a half dozen times during the making of those drinks ordered after ours to talk to friends.

5. I go and stand near the counter, and see she's looking at our cups. But wait! Someone just walked in the door! "You want nonfat, right?" she asks the person who came in. She makes that person's latte. Nonfat. Then she rings them up, and asks them what's new.

6. Finally, other employees get there (who actually remember and like us). One employee takes over making our drinks and is having trouble reading the rude, stressed out person's handwriting on the scratch paper. I lean in and ask if I can help and ask her which one is decaf (for shawna)? And the rude barista butts in. And says, in all caps but not yelling: "I WROTE DOWN EVERYTHING YOU SAID. SHE IS MAKING THEM TO YOUR SPECIFICATIONS." like, totally deadpanned. And she doesn't even look at me as she chastises and condescends a paying customer. Oh, the swear words circling my brain right now. Sorry I gave you money and asked for something. Sorry for putting you out.

But, OMG. "Specifications"? I know I personally have a slightly demanding drink (that complicated soy!), but the rest of what we ordered was, like, "mocha."

I should also add that half of the doors were still locked (at 9:30 am), the sign wasn't even out on the sidewalk, and all of the patio chairs were stacked inside the cafe. Hello, disaster! Well, certainly not for her friends or the people in line behind us. They were happy. I normally love love love this place so I won't bastardize it's name on the internet unless you really want to know. I'll just hope that they fire this girl.